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12 May 2021

 Song mood: Thunderstruck by AC/DC. I think about this song and think about the Thor book that I want to write.

I am all kinds of tired, second day in a row. I know at some point, I will get a decent night’s sleep. But not now and probably not soon. I keep to myself at the moment as I’m likely to throw Deadpool like insults and really mean what I say. My headache is still bad even after taking Tylenol. I want to take more pills, but don’t. It is taking me forever to even write this blog post.

I ran today, the first time in like forever. It was only for three miles. I walked a mile after that. I have been cutting out snacks. So I eat less and if I wake up early, that’s okay. Once I lose weight and am weight 168, I will be happier with myself.

In my musings last night, I rediscovered my core self. My core self is rooted in self improvement. That it is my essential self. To improve myself and others. It has been tougher to do that during the pandemic. Well, improving others, I’m not sure that I am at all good at that, but I try when I can.

Years ago I had this idea of the modern knight. Here’s what the modern knight had to do: 1.) master a martial art 2.) be able to write and recite poetry 3.) speak a second language. There are other things a knight should be able to do, but these were the three big ones to work on. 

So for the longest while, I studied Karate and Japanese. Since then I learned Korean. But I haven’t used those two languages for ten years now, so I will say that I’m not good at those.

I’m learning French, or trying to. I’m learning Tai Chi, but mainly because I have issues with my joints. But Tai Chi is also good for self improvement. There are so many benefits that go with it. Well mainly for the breathing. But it is also good for self defense. It’s not like Karate, but then I would probably injure myself if I went back to that martial art.

I’m on this road for self improvement, one moment at a time. Hopefully the day of a restful night’s sleep comes and then I would be able to make great strides towards improving myself.


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