Skip to main content

3 July - 4 July 2021

 Song mood: Tear in My Heart by twenty one pilots.

Every now and them, you come across somebody and you say, wow, they get it. And it makes you think that other people might get it too.

I watch these videos by this one woman on Tik Tok. Most of the videos are comedic, but there was this one video that was real serious. It was written as an apology and I thought I’d share the lyrics. To me, the words along with the way they were presented were beautiful:

You shouldn’t be afraid to go outside

Color shouldn’t matter because inside

We are flesh, we are bones

We are fighting the unknown

I’m raising my hands saying you are not alone.

Every time I watch this, I go wow, this person really gets it. I was touched because I think, someone understands my struggle. I know the song wasn’t written for me, but I feel better about the world because there is someone out there who does understand my struggle. She’s not the only one who understands. There are others who understand. 

Sometimes I forget that when I’m going through my issues. I do have a chip on my shoulder. From past experiences of growing up in a town of two thousand that had a total of ten minorities. People treated me different. And not always in a good way. Anyway.

The trip to Kansas City was good. I enjoyed going to the museum. Water Lilies by Monet was my favorite. There were around six Monet’s at the museum. A few Manet’s and one Rembrant. In the next few days I will select which works of art I will use for poems. I maybe took pictures of 150 works of art before the battery on my phone died.

Sometimes crappy things happen to you. Or, in this reference, to me. Enough crappy things push me to start looking in different directions. And I come up with the same answers, just seen in a different light. It’s like I’m in this hell. I’m trying to get out. But, the crappy things happen. So I look for ways to get out of this hell.

Then I stumble on this profile of someone who gets it. Life is hard. It’s difficult. We’re going to need all our strength. If one person gets it, there’s bound to be other people who get it. It’s someone who sits across from me at a writer’s group. It’s the barista who talked with me about art while we’re waiting for the espresso shot to be finished. It’s the friend that I have been waiting for.

So, I will continue to work on my mystery novella and go from there. Tomorrow, or rather today, I will hang out with family. I will smile, I will nod, I will make polite conversation. I will do my thing because that’s the only thing I really know how to do.


Popular posts from this blog

18 November 2020

Song mood: Mysterious Ways by U2. Currently I’m listening to The Ruin by Dervla McTiernan.  I’ve listened to a couple of novellas that she wrote where her detective Cormac Reilly briefly shows up in and liked them.  This is the first book with her star detective.  Between McTiernan and Trevor on who writes better suspense, I would say hands down McTiernan.   A person who writes mysteries as a genre follow a set of conventions so that the reader isn’t in a state of confusion.  One great example is putting dates before each section or series of sections.  Literary writers don’t follow conventions and the confusion at times come from the writing.  Where I say, let the characters mislead the reader not the writing itself. I am enjoying The Ruin .  It’s nice to get back to a solid mystery. I continue to walk at the lake.  Although, it’s a modified path where I get around 2.5 miles instead 4 miles.  I still need to figure out what to do for exercise in the winter.  I want to get a rowing m

30 August 2020

  Song mood: In Too Deep by Genesis. It’s been an Inspector Morse weekend.  I’m halfway through the original series.  I think I came upon an understanding.  If the show follows the book closely, it will say based on the book.  After the second season, the shows stopped following the books closely and then it says based off the characters.  Some of them say based off an idea by the author, which would indicate that the author collaborated with the producers for the screenplay. The other thing that I realized is that if they are going to follow the series, Chief Inspector Thursday won’t be in the new show for much longer.  Which this last season hinted at. I expect to work on my own mystery this week.  It happens in Sandy, England.  My Inspector Trevor is surnamed after the Irish author, William Trevor.   Trevor is one of the biggest names in literature.  Or he was when I attended college for Creative Writing.  I’ve read a few of his short stories.  I think I should listen to a fe

12 July 2020

Song mood: Zoo Station by U2.  Although I’m not sure I’m ready for anything. Goal for the week is to finish the second draft.  Then to both start the next book and to edit.  A tool that I picked up from one of my writer friends is .  Kind of like a thesaurus but possibly better. I still haven’t figured out what I am doing for August poems.  So far the museums are not opening up.  The only one I found that was openning next week was in Hastings, NE.  And that one is a science museum.  What I need is someone who is good as a writing exercise list generator.  Or someone who could come up with a writing exercise task.  Who could come up with an easy to do poetry theme for a month.  I need a writing partner.  Well, I need a partner.  A partner in crime possibly? I still haven’t figured out my camera.  I’m still behind on French.  I want to be ready by the next time I go. I still haven’t figured out a lot of things.  I will go back to the small portions mult