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Watching your Live Chat

I watched your live event last night and I feel guilty for not jumping in and saying hi. I feel guilty for not going on and saying that I think that you are amazing.  I really do think you are amazing.

You have the patience of a saint. I was impressed by the way that you handled people’s questions. People want to tell you things and that is a good thing. I want to tell you things. I think about a message that I want to send you and my thoughts go off in a tangent because I want to tell you so much. Where I say to myself, this kind of letter, it should be about her.

Live events are kind of like parties. I’m never sure of what I should do. Which is probably why I don’t jump on, but watch. I had my one and done beer earlier, and though I wasn’t drunk, I tend to err on the side of caution these days. So I don’t blurt out things like I love you. Which, is true. But should be said first in a conversation while sober.

People say the weirdest things. I hope no one is catfishing you, that is a disturbing thought.

When I was living in Korea, I would think I was this terrible teacher. One of my coworkers, who had been educated in teaching children told me, that the children love you. Where I asked, how do you know that? She told me, because they want to talk with you. They want to tell you things. They wouldn’t do that if they didn’t like you. I thought of that when you were doing your live event. People want to tell you things.

Like I wouldn’t say that I have depression in a public form. Though I do. I manage my depression through maintaining balance. The right amount of exercise, the right amount of sleep. Eating healthier. And thanks to you, drinking more water.

If I were over there and dating you, I would feel guilty. Until I remind myself that a relationship, or a friendship for that matter: is two people who enjoys each other’s company, who does things for each other. I know, that last sentence probably wasn’t grammatically correct. If we were on a date, I would let you know that I was enjoying your company. As I enjoy watching your videos.

Anyway. I think you are doing an amazing job. Ten out of ten. And if I had joined the chat, I would have let you know.

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